As we continue to consider how to maximize marriage it is important to understand the roles of husband and wife.  Just as men and women are created uniquely as male and female, so also are they gifted and called to unique roles in the covenant relationship we call marriage. What does God expect of husbands? What does He expect of wives? Are we called to be Ozzie and Harriet? Bonnie and Clyde? Homer and Marge?  Clearly not, but what are we called to be?

Played: 73 | Download | Duration: 00:43:42

Wives’ Standing Orders:
“Wives submit to your husbands as unto the Lord . . . . And the wife must respect her husband.”
Ephesians 5:25
Biblical Submission:
        Demonstrated within the Trinity
        Demonstrated by the church and Christ
        Requires trust in the Lord
        Provides “covering” for the wife
        Has limits
 
                Not just to believing husbands
                Submission is voluntary
                Wives are never to disobey God’s Word
              Wives are never to submit to abuse
Respect:
        Works together with submission
        Speaks positively about him
        Speaks positively to him.
 
Husbands’ Standing Orders:
"Husbands, love your wives.”
Ephesians 5:25
 
“Live with them in an atmosphere of understanding.”               
1 Peter 3:7
 
“View them as precious and worthy of high honor.”               
1 Peter 3:7
Biblical Headship aka “Servanthood”
Three pictures of “headship”
        Christ for the church
        As your own body
        The church to Christ
 
Understanding Loving - Understanding Living
        Pitch your tent with her
        Do that by understanding her needs
        Develop a lifestyle of learned loving
 
Her Honor
        The word describes how precious she is
        This is her inherent quality
        This is an active, ongoing choice
 

Putting it to work:

• Have you prayed together this week?  How many times?
• Have you prayed for your spouse this week? How many times?
• Would someone know the depth of your love by observing your interactions at home?
• How many decisions did you make this week, that hindered your desires for her sake? 
• This week, have you said more positive things     about (or to) your husband than negative?
• What specific thing have you done this week to     demonstrate your love for each other?
• Are you willing to change your decision for the     sake of your wife?
• Are you willing to submit to your husband, even when you think he’s wrong?

 
Can you possibly hope to love each other in these ways apart from the power of Christ?

SCRIPTURE
 
1 Peter 1:15-19 NIV
But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; 16 for it is written: "Be holy, because I am holy." 17 Since you call on a Father who judges each man's work impartially, live your lives as strangers here in reverent fear. 18 For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your forefathers, 19 but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect.
 
Mark 10:43-45 NIV
Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, 44 and whoever wants to be first must be slave of all. 45 For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."
 
Ephesians 5:21-33 NIV 
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
 
 22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 2
 
5 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church-- 30 for we are members of his body. 31 "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." 32 This is a profound mystery--but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
 
1 Peter 3:1-7 NIV
Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. 4 Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. 5 For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, 6 like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.
 
7  Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
 
1 Peter 6:7 NASB
You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.
 
John 13:20 NIV
 I tell you the truth, whoever accepts anyone I send accepts me; and whoever accepts me accepts the one who sent me."
 
John 16:7 NIV
But I tell you the truth: It is for your good that I am going away. Unless I go away, the Counselor will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you.